Addiction
Recovering from the Private Killer of Porn Addiction
It was a catastrophic personal event that plunged me into three years of intense habitual and addictive behavior that needed to be addressed. It was then that I finally recognized my addiction needed to be stopped. Downloading porn videos and images as well as participating in sex chats—all are obvious markers of addiction. And I…
Read MoreA Reflection on Attachment, Addiction, Psychology, and Spiritual Formation: Part Three
Attachment, as we have seen in previous articles (Part One and Part Two), is central to addiction, recovery, and spiritual growth. But what is it? Where does it come from? How does it get so compromised that we turn to substance abuse and other compulsive behaviors to fill the vacuum in our hearts? Attachment is…
Read MoreThe Four Virtues and The Role of Grace in Our Recovery
In a recent discussion on how to develop virtuous habits to combat negative ones connected with sexual sin, I was introduced to the four cardinal virtues, which are prudence, courage, temperance, and justice. Each of these virtues can help us live moral lives. Following the discussion, I continued to ponder what I liked about my…
Read More5 Strategies for Overcoming an Addiction to Porn and Masturbation
Before discussing five strategies that help me stay clean with regard to porn and masturbation, let me start by explaining that nothing short of the grace and mercy of God ever worked in helping me experience victory over this ongoing battle, which spanned over 40 years. Only God can ultimately free us. I’ve spent a…
Read MoreA Reflection on Attachment, Addiction, Psychology, and Spiritual Formation: Part Two
In my last article, I talked about “attachment” as a common thread among addiction, psychology, and spirituality. Attachment in all of these areas is about relationships, whether spiritual (God and the human being), psychological (mother and child), or self-destructive (a person and his or her compulsive, self-destructive behaviors). Healthy divine and human relationships bring about…
Read MoreFor the Addict Who Still Suffers: How Recovery Brings About Unexpected Relationships
My first sponsor in SAA (Sex Addicts Anonymous) formed a relationship with me that included doing step work, but also included other activities not related to recovery. Seeing my youth, strength, and a willingness to help, he once asked me to come to his house in order to help move furniture. Not too much to…
Read MoreAllowing the Infinite Power of God to Save Us from Our Sinfulness and Addictions
Scripture tells us, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom” (Proverbs 9:30). Too often, when we think of or talk about God, we speak of a being who is meek and mild. We see Him as completely approachable, and that there is nothing to fear in approaching Him. A program that I…
Read MoreRemembering the Truth of Christmas In Order to Stay Sober
The snow falls quietly. And slowly all is covered and blanketed in whiteness. The cold of winter is in the air, and it gets in your bones when outside. There is the anticipation of the holidays and all of the hopes and dreams of Christmas that come with the onset of the cold weather and…
Read MoreA Reflection on Attachment, Addiction, Psychology, and Spiritual Formation: Part One
I’ve confronted addiction from several directions in my life: as a therapist treating people in recovery, as a codependent in an alcoholic family, and as a Catholic man trying to discern God’s will and action in the midst of the fear, rage, and despair that addiction unleashes. Through all of these experiences, there is a…
Read MoreOne Woman Finds Recovery from Addiction through God’s Grace
I never wanted to stop drinking. I loved to drink. I realized I was an alcoholic in my 20s when I was in school in New York. I remember telling this to my brother, to which he responded, “You think?” I grew up in a middle-class home in northern Virginia. My parents never drank. In…
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