Taking custody of the mind is a topic that always piques much interest when brought up in recovery meetings. Those of us who struggle with addictions, compulsions, and unhealthy attachments recognize the mind as a battlefield. I was introduced to the concept of “custody of the mind” by a Catholic therapist trained in Thomistic psychology. She described taking custody of the mind as building right habits using the intellect and will to help align feelings and emotions to conform to truth. 

Taking custody of the mind is a two-step process that employs repression and reformulation. Having custody of the mind means having control over one’s imagination (memory/emotional association) and intellect, and it allows us to prevent and stop unhealthy ruminating that spurs negative feelings, associations, and memories.

For many of us, much of what occurs in our interior life happens automatically and goes undetected, rendering us overwhelmed and “triggered” when we encounter something that is troubling to us. Then, in an attempt to numb and/or escape from overwhelming negative emotions, we are tempted to go down the treacherous path of addictive behavior.

For example, let’s say you see someone with whom you have had a prior conflict. Perhaps you have tried to reconcile but things remain unresolved. Upon seeing him or her, you become overcome with feelings of hurt, defensiveness, anger, and helplessness. You try to go about your day after this encounter but you can’t seem to shake your negative or unpleasant feelings or stop replaying past events associated with the person in your mind. If it continues unchecked, it could lead to acting out an unhealthy behavior or engaging in an addictive substance to flee from the discomfort. This would be a good instance to practice “custody of the mind” instead to keep from spiraling toward committing an unhealthy behavior of your choice.

The therapist I worked with described the process for taking custody of the mind through the following two steps:

Step One – Repression

The soul (intellect and will) can have only one intention at a time. Therefore, if we choose to repress difficult mental images/emotions by focusing on our external senses, the images and emotions will eventually lessen in intensity or fade altogether. This offers a short-term solution to stop the image/feelings from overwhelming us. It helps prepare us to then use our intellect and will to gain more control of our interior state. Below are sequential steps we can follow to use repression by focusing on our external senses when we experience negative mental images and emotions:

1. Say “No” to the mental image/emotion and turn away from it. 
2. Use your external senses in a healthy way to change your inner state. You can ground yourself in the senses by focusing on what you see, hear, smell, etc. in the moment and/or by using a “sensible” aid you can touch or observe. While any sensible aid will work, religious articles, such as a medal, rosary, or crucifix are powerful ones. Therefore, you may want to carry such an article with you daily. 
3. Begin breathing deeply and slowly, focusing on your breath.
4. Pray to the Lord, Our Lady, your Guardian Angel, or a saint, asking for help to overcome this particularly challenging moment. While certainly not an exhaustive list, you can then engage in one or more of the following activities to help with repression:

• • Engage with another person in a conversation or activity.
  • Listen to soothing music.
  • Reading Scripture or spiritual writing.
  • Get out in nature by walking or doing some other form of exercise.
  • Focus on work or studying.

Step Two – Reformation

Reformulation is the process by which we engage our intellect and imagination to change our perspectives and create new positive associations. Over time this leads to rightly ordered habits of thought. Reformulation helps us gain interior control by considering the truth of our reality in light of Jesus Christ. Done repeatedly, it disengages the negative mental image from the intense emotion. Therefore, what at first created a negative emotion (feelings of shame, victimhood, intense craving, fear, etc.) can, over time, be replaced by a positive emotion related to God (gratitude, trust, a sense of Christ’s presence, etc.). Below are some examples of engaging in reformulation when encountering a difficult and triggering situation (person, place, event, memory, etc.):

• Offer praise and thanksgiving for how God is strengthening you through this challenge. 
• See the challenge as an opportunity to build a virtue, such as faith, hope, charity, fortitude, or humility.  
• Offer it up for someone out of love for Christ. 
• Recite a memorized verse from Scripture that speaks truth as opposed to whatever lie is cycling in your head. 
• Contemplate Jesus or Our Lady and focus on their love for you.

We can also write out these reformations to help solidify them as habitual thoughts. For example, using the example from above, the next time we see that troubling person and experience negative emotions we might choose to focus on the rosary in our hand and, as best as we can, ask for Mary’s help in the midst of that suffering (repression). Asking for help might then lead to us seeing this suffering as an opportunity to pray for that person by offering up our emotional and mental distress as an act of love (reformulation). We might then spend time journaling about how we are being invited to respond in this way whenever we encounter that person (or a similar triggering situation). In fact, we might write this down several times, or write something similar down for other triggers we encounter in our daily life.

Over time, the more we engage in repression and reformulation, the more peace we will experience the next time we encounter a triggering situation. Our intellect and imagination, instead of spiraling out of control around a lie or negative memory, will more easily conform to God’s healing truth. We will experience greater interior freedom, making it much less likely that we’ll engage in our unhealthy behavior of choice as a result of some triggering encounter. And we’ll be able to heed Saint Paul’s exhortation to remain free in Christ: “For freedom Christ has set us free; stand fast therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery” (Galatians 5:1).
 

Stephanie N. is a beloved daughter of God who is in recovery from disordered eating. She lives in New Orleans, Louisiana, and has a particular devotion to Our Lady of Sorrows.