What the Church means by “chastity of the eyes” relates to the notion of avoiding the “near occasion of sin.” And understanding the Church’s meaning behind chastity of the eyes can help all of us struggling with addictions, compulsions, or unhealthy attachments avoid seeing or longing after certain things, which can lead to relapse.
In Catholic tradition, “chastity of the eyes” refers to the practice of guarding what we allow ourselves to look at and dwell on. It’s often connected to sexual purity, calling us to turn away from lustful or inappropriate images and thoughts. However, this practice isn’t only about avoiding sexual temptation; it’s also about learning to master our desires as well as training our eyes and hearts to seek what is good, true, and holy. It speaks to a deeper call for self-control and spiritual integrity in all areas of our lives.
Practicing chastity of the eyes has been an ongoing process of learning and discovery for me. For individuals such as myself struggling with lust-related addictions like pornography, the concept of chastity of the eyes holds profound significance. It requires a disciplined approach to what we view and dwell on, recognizing that visual stimuli can trigger and reinforce addictive behaviors. Saint Alphonsus de Liguori taught, “To avoid the sight of dangerous objects…keep [your] eyes almost continually fixed on the earth.” In other words, we should keep our gaze fixed on things that do not cause us temptation.
Dangerous visual triggers often led me to temptation and relapse early on in my recovery. I would then fall back on the grace of God’s forgiveness, calling to mind the words of Our Lord: “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God” (Matthew 5:8). Visual triggers are big for lust addicts, but even if your battle is with food, alcohol, shopping, screens, or something else, the same principle applies. What we look at often determines what we crave. That is why having effective strategies to avoid temptation and, of course, frequenting the sacraments are so essential to avoiding relapse and sin.
While practicing chastity of the eyes was very difficult for me during my early recovery, after several years of sobriety, I now see the importance of it. In my experience, this means practically putting filters on my phone, avoiding certain shows or websites, and walking away from triggering environments. I recently shared in a CIR’s Men’s Big Book study for lust addiction that I went nearly a year avoiding social media and screens. I did this because I humbly accepted my wounds, and I was committed to guarding them with vigilance.
While my experience has been with lust-related addiction, the same strategies apply to other addictions. If we struggle with food, do we put ourselves in avoidable situations where we will be tempted to indulge? Do you spend time with people who don’t support our decision to eat, or not eat, a certain way? If we struggle with shopping or taking on debt, are we ensuring we don’t spend time perusing certain websites or meandering around shopping malls? If we struggle with alcohol or drugs, do we continue to associate with people from our former life who partake in those unhealthy lifestyles and have no concern for our recovery? In other words, are we doing our best, within reason, to avoid looking at people, situations, and things that cause us the temptation to relapse?
Below are some questions to consider to help maintain the chastity of the eyes:
- What are your triggers? What causes you to feel your old cravings?
- What strategies and aids are you using to guard yourself from these triggers? What have you tried doing that isn’t working? Why not? Are you truly doing your best to practice chastity of the eyes in your recovery?
- How are you incorporating Scripture, the sacraments, prayer, your faith and recovery communities into practicing chastity of the eyes? Is there more you can be doing?
No matter where you are on your recovery journey, you are not alone. We are fighting a unique battle, but we are in the same war. And the more we support each other, pray for each other, frequent the grace offered to us in the sacraments, and remind each other of the truth of God’s love for us, the stronger we become. The enemy hasn’t given up—but neither has our savior, Jesus Christ. He has armed us with Scripture, the sacraments, prayer, community, and the Church’s great wisdom, which includes the idea of chastity of the eyes. Recovery is the path of the warrior for Christ. And every day we choose to walk in truth, prayer, and humility, we are claiming ground in the name of Our Lord.
Aaron Walter is a lifelong Catholic and former porn addict whose ministry, NewMenRising, is dedicated to pornography addiction recovery. He is a coach, mentor, and accountability partner and is passionate about helping husbands kick their addiction and transform their lives and relationships. You can connect with him at calendly.com/aaronwaltercoachingsessions.