Scripture tells us, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom” (Proverbs 9:30). Too often, when we think of or talk about God, we speak of a being who is meek and mild. We see Him as completely approachable, and that there is nothing to fear in approaching Him. A program that I am involved in, Exodus 90, introduced me to the idea of the “incomprehensibility” of God. The program cautions us that we are deceiving ourselves if we consider God to be harmless.
Appropriate fear of the Lord produces respect. Water can be seen as an agent that cleanses, nourishes, and soothes. It’s power, when properly harnessed, can provide the energy to move locomotives or produce electricity to illuminate a city. However, the power of water can destroy communities through floods, taking people’s lives. Regardless of what people may think, water is far from harmless. This is true of God, and much more so!
While God is all powerful, He is also all loving and all forgiving. This means that while we should have a healthy fear of the Lord so that we are not condemned in our sin, we should also remember that by His infinite power he can free us from our sinfulness and addictions, no matter how great. But what makes us different from everything else in creation is that we have free will. And so we have to choose to receive God’s love, forgiveness, and power to free us from our sins and addictions.
I have written in the past about working on Step Two and Step Three. I believed in God. However, I continued to try to win the battle against masturbation and porn addiction on my own. I worried that because I was unable to conquer these demons that I would perhaps be denied eternal life.
I fought and lost the battle for over 40 years, but I was blessed with a miraculous release through the graces received from my Consecration to Divine Mercy. Yes, I still have to do my part. I practice the daily disciplines of reading Scripture, praying, establishing accountability partners, going regularly to the Sacrament of Reconciliation, and receiving often the Eucharist. However, my masturbation and porn addiction was lifted almost without me realizing it so that I would not be tempted to take credit for the accomplishment!
As I have pondered my journey over the last four years, I am caught up in wonder and awe at the power and mercy that God has revealed to me. I work daily to grow in my trust and reliance on God’s desire to fill me with His glory so that I may better reflect His glory. I understand better today that the purpose of the miraculous release I have enjoyed is only to give glory to God.
Ultimately, we need to come to the awareness that God is all powerful and that nothing is impossible for Him. But we need to make sure we actually allow him to use His power in our lives, as He will never intrude upon our free will. But when we do, the Spirit will unleash amazing graces that have the power to transform us!
Jim Gorski is a 57-year-old father of four children who has been married to the same woman for 35 years. He completed his master’s degree in social work in 1984 and has directed church music groups for the past 41 years. He remains a grateful child of the most high God and strives to trust in God’s loving mercy and His ability to provide for Jim’s every need.